Well, it would appear Kevin has quite an aggressive attitude towards finding his old items of clothing and other such apparel - when looking through his wardrobe. I don't even know where to begin narrating this nugget of vintage Kevin comedy, but here goes...
In my opinion, the human cerebrum has to be the most fascinating organ in existence. However, there exists one that outshines all others. This human being eclipses all others and his intelligence/reasoning is off the chart. Forget Professor Brian Cox; forget Professor Stephen Hawking; and forget Professor Green. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you... The brain of Kevin Seaman!
Date: [18/08/2011 Anno Domini, ≈14.30PM]: -
A spontaneous cluster of neurological chemical reactions occurred within Kevin's thalamus. These stimulated his pituitary gland; a feeling of thirst ensued; and he purchased a pint of Boondoggle. After several repetitions of this process, Kevin was basically shit-faced.
At this point, Kevin's cerebellum had been rendered useless. However, the sound waves produced by the ongoing conversation were being processed and interpreted by Kevin's temporal lobes at a rapid rate. This resulted in his frontal lobe throwing an absolute fucking tantrum and it manifesting the following quote: -
"When you look through your wardrobe and you find an old t-shirt, do you ever think to yourself "I wonder if this still facking fits?"? Then when you try it on it facking doesn't. Facking pisses me off!"
He said this with a nonchalant expression on his face.
The rest of us were debating whether or not to go to another pub when he said this...
In my opinion, the human cerebrum has to be the most fascinating organ in existence. However, there exists one that outshines all others. This human being eclipses all others and his intelligence/reasoning is off the chart. Forget Professor Brian Cox; forget Professor Stephen Hawking; and forget Professor Green. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you... The brain of Kevin Seaman!
Date: [18/08/2011 Anno Domini, ≈14.30PM]: -
A spontaneous cluster of neurological chemical reactions occurred within Kevin's thalamus. These stimulated his pituitary gland; a feeling of thirst ensued; and he purchased a pint of Boondoggle. After several repetitions of this process, Kevin was basically shit-faced.
At this point, Kevin's cerebellum had been rendered useless. However, the sound waves produced by the ongoing conversation were being processed and interpreted by Kevin's temporal lobes at a rapid rate. This resulted in his frontal lobe throwing an absolute fucking tantrum and it manifesting the following quote: -
"When you look through your wardrobe and you find an old t-shirt, do you ever think to yourself "I wonder if this still facking fits?"? Then when you try it on it facking doesn't. Facking pisses me off!"
He said this with a nonchalant expression on his face.
The rest of us were debating whether or not to go to another pub when he said this...
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